The Importance of Parent Involvement in Music Lessons and Practice

Your first thought might be "Well, I am paying you to coach my child so coach my child", or "The rules of delegating would say that since you are the coach, you should be the only source of music coaching and my child will learn enough this way".

Both thoughts are half-correct. You see, a child that spends 30 minutes in a lesson (or ideally 60 if they have the attention span or lessons twice weekly) is only getting 30 minutes of practice a week, even if it is with a qualified coach. The true magic, and what enables lessons to push forward quickly, and what will make your child a better musician faster is what happens on the 6 days they are not with their coach.

Having a rudimentary understanding of what your child needs to do, and what their music lesson homework is each week will help you guide (not push) your child to spend 5-45 minutes a day practicing correctly.

Why is practicing correctly so important?

How you practice is just as important as what you practice. Practicing something the wrong way over and over again creates a “bad habit” that will take much more time, focus, and energy to correct.

Practice something the right way 100 times and ... 
You will play it right on the 101st time

Practice something the wrong way 100 times and ...
You will play it wrong on the 101st time

Practice something the right way 50 times and the wrong way 50 times and ...
         You have a 50% chance of playing it right on the 101st time 

How to Get It Right:

1.   Start slow. Only play at speeds where your child makes no mistakes. If they start to mess up, it means they are going too fast. Slow down and try again. Gradually increase the speed over days, weeks, and months. Slow down if they start to make mistakes.
2.   If your child makes a mistake, try not to get too frustrated or angry with them or yourself. They take cues for dealing with adverse situations from you. Model handling mistakes with grace, but acknowledge that it was a mistake and things can be improved. If anger or frustration are left unchecked, these emotions will probably cause you/your child to mess up again, increasing the frustration, which will increase the number of mistakes you/they make! If you start to feel frustrated, angry, impatient or overwhelmed or see any of these states beginning to brew in your child, put their instrument down and take a break for a few minutes. Return to playing when you/they have had a chance to cool down your/their emotions.
3.   Stay relaxed, do not hold tension in your face, tongue, jaw, neck, shoulders, arms, wrists, or hands, you are modeling good technique for your child. If you see them tense up with focus, gently remind them to relax. 
4.   Practicing for a small amount of time every day is better than practicing for a large amount of time every other day. Your child will remember the songs and exercises they are learning much faster and with more accuracy with daily practice sessions. For example, 30 minutes a day is better than 1 hour every other day.
5.   Some students may not have the luxury of 30 minutes a day to dedicate to music. Try to carve out 5-15 minutes a day and focus on mastering one musical task before moving on to the next. Let your coach know you have time limitations and they will work with you to create a customized practice schedule that works for your family schedule.
6.   Everyone misses a couple of days of practice here and there. Try not to feel bad about missing your practice session. Understand your child may need to take a step back in their progress when you get back to practicing, but they will quickly return to where they were and continue to grow.